Another One Bites the Dust

Last Sunday Jake Ryan and I got into a bit of an argument, where I unintentionally insulted him (he was way too defensive – I was only kidding around) and he actually insulted me. I called him back and I apologized, but he never did, and things have been weird ever since. I don’t hear from him again until Tuesday when he texts me, and when I call him to chat instead he half jokingly asks me to make it “snappy” because he’s busy watching tv and having dinner. I just said “FINE!” half petulently and then hung up. He texted me “You’re in a good mood ” and I just said back “Not my problem you’re an asshole!” and I don’t hear from him again.

I call him last night (Friday) but he doesn’t pick up, though he texts me to say he’s out and asks how I am. Literally. “Hi, I’m with coworkers. How are you?” It was so formal and weird. I just wrote back, “Good. Just wanted to chat. Having fun?” Then he just says he is and is gonna go to sleep soon and “Good night.”, ending our text convo just like that. And that’s the last time I heard anything from him, and he hasn’t tried making plans with me at all, which he did constantly at the beginning. I just don’t understand why he thinks he knows me well enough to just cut me out like that, to rather abruptly decide he isn’t interested! I wish he’d just talk to me, but he refuses.

I tried, but he isn’t giving an inch. I don’t know what went wrong or what I did. I’m still having a hard time wrapping my head around the complete 180. This is like Colin all over again, only on a smaller degree. It still makes me sad, but only because I was so happy and he was so sweet before, and life is just that much sweeter when a boy is being sweet, if you know what I mean! Well, what can I do? Nothing. At least I still have his prescription painkillers. (Ha.) What a disappointment.

The best thing

about having Jake Ryan in my bed is on mornings like this one when I wake up and I’m cold and I inch over to him as I tell him and he wraps his arms around me and gives me a kiss and I’m no longer cold.

That’s all.

So…we did it.

I don’t normally talk about sex so much on this blog (maybe because I haven’t had any, haha), but I just feel compelled to this time (don’t worry – no gory details – or, I’m sorry in advance for no gory details, depending on what you were hoping for!). Anyway, on Tuesday Jake Ryan called saying he thinks he thought he could get out of work early and asked if he could come by and see me, so of course I said yes. He brought me dinner (a sampling of different pizzas, lol), and we got into bed to watch a DVD but of course one thing led to another, although we didn’t go all the way (he’s REALLY good about respecting what I want – he never does anything to make me feel uncomfortable, and is always very aware of what my boundaries are and never pushes for me even though he (visibly) wants more).

He went home around midnight b/c he didn’t have any clothes for work the next day, and I fell asleep happy. He texted yesterday afternoon and then later called me around 10, but I was on the phone with my parents so didn’t pick up. When we hung up I looked at my phone and he had sent a text going “Hey what if I told you I’m trying to pick your butt up in a cab right now…” so I called him back immediately, and he said he’d just gotten back to the city and was in a cab headed to my apartment, and asked if I’d like to go down to his apartment for the night.

Obviously my answer was yes, and I couldn’t really believe that he was actually just heading on over to mine in the hopes that I’d go back to his place with him, lol. (Even though it’s slightly presumptuous!) So I got up, gathered my eye drops and toothbrush and bundled up to head outside, where he was already waiting. Part of the reason I went was not only because I wanted to see him, but also cause I was curious about his apartment and what it looked like – there’s always something personal about a living space, regardless of whether there are any photos or other things up.

We got to his and then I saw his guitars, and asked him to play and sing for me, and even though he was shy about it at first he picked it up and started playing a sampler of songs that he knows, even singing along to all the acoustic songs, including some of my favorites like Jason Mraz’s “I’m Yours” and “Lucky” (SWOON). Seriously, I couldn’t stop smiling when he was singing and playing the guitar. This is the second guitar player I’ve ever dated, and I LOVE talented boys!

In bed later we somehow started wrestling, until I made him stop (probably not good for my eye…) and he was being all goofy and going a little nuts, but I could tell he was just being himself and it was kinda cute that he was comfortable enough to do that in front of me and not worry about me judging him. Anyway we ended up doing the deed after he did some work and I was trying to sleep in his bed, and god it was good. haha AND he cuddled after – how perfect is he? haha Later he even apologized for having to detach himself from me so he could sleep properly – I mean seriously, I don’t mind, I understand it’s more comfortable to sleep without being stuck to someone else, but he was like “I’m sorry, thank you for understanding”. WHAT? haha

My bff was like “There has to be SOMETHING wrong with him…” haha.

I’m happy. And it’s so nice to be happy about a boy again, especially one as sweet as Jake Ryan! Not sure when I’m seeing again before Sunday (told him I’d like to treat him to brunch to thank him for spending practically all last weekend in the hospital with me), but in the meantime it’s awesome to just be able to smile everytime I think of him (ok, feel free to puke up a little bit right now).

…and on our 3rd date I had surgery.

So you know how I was supposed to have my third date with Jake Ryan Saturday night? I had an eye emergency instead and had to go to the emergency room at the eye & ear emergency room near my place, and I was panicking even when I called him to cancel the date (obviously – it’s pretty scary, and what I suspected I had (and was right about) is really scary b/c if you don’t act fast enough you could actually go blind and not be able to recover any eyesight in that eye).

Anyway so he offered to come be with me instead of us going on our date, and even though I told him my cousin and roommate were going to be with me (and even though I warned him that I’m a mess – literally, I was dressed like a fisherman b/c it was pouring buckets outside and I’d just changed into comfy clothes since I had just gotten home from work), he came.

It was a LONG night – I got the ER at about 8.30 and didn’t leave until 3.30, and he was with me the whole time. At the end they had to patch up both my eyes for pre-surgery the next morning, and him and my roommate took me home (and he lifted me into and out of the cab, as well as up some random stairs in my apt building), and I knew I would need him the next day to get to the ER and into surgery, so asked him if he’d mind staying over.

He totally didn’t, and I took the chance to ask if he was seeing anyone else and he said he wasn’t, and asked if I was and I said no, then explained that I don’t just sleep around casually (his response: “I could sense that about you.” ) and then said if I were to sleep with him, I would prefer if he didn’t see/sleep with anyone else…and he agreed, saying, “I think I can do that” and then kissed me. We didn’t sleep together that night (I didn’t exactly want our first time for me to be blind – and not by choice!), but we had fun anyway and he held me as we slept for 2 hours before having to get up to go to the hospital.

He stayed the whole day with me, and in between waiting around I let him get into my hospital bed and he’d cuddle me and we’d nap. He only left when I went into surgery, and when I woke up he was right there, all showered and freshly shaved

My roommate also thinks he’s cuter than Ryan Gosling, ps. lol (Even though he does look like him.) And I can’t believe that on our 3rd date he actually spent nearly an entire weekend with me in the hospital, taking care of me and still being affectionate even though my eye was all patched up and I must have looked pretty pathetic. Seriously, how did I get so lucky?? He also kept joking around and making me laugh, which really helped.

Seriously, can I marry him now? haha He’s off to another state for work again today, but he called me yesterday saying he couldn’t find any cool eye patches on ebay for me (LOL) and that he’ll drop by after work sometime when he figures out when he’ll be back.

I love him, and my eye is still kinda killing me (I feel like I’ve been punched in the eye, and it’s still super sore and red) but I had to share about this weekend and what a sweetie he is. I really lucked out this time, didn’t I??

I was interviewed! (And more Jake)

The fabulous Fabulously Broke, of Fabulously Broke in the City, recently interviewed me and posted it up today! Check it out here.

Also, my worries about Jake are totally unnecessary – he texted me today when I was at more training for my second job, “Heya cutie, so when on earth am I going to be able to see you again? (I’m guessing you haven’t talked to your boss, but let me know if you get off saturday )” (I’m working until 1010 Wednesday through Saturday, but the manager said we could discuss changing my Saturday shift when I get to work on Wednesday, so fingers crossed!!) So I texted him back saying I’ll let him know after I work tomorrow, and he said “Even if you work saturday night we could maybe hang out saturday morning, but i have to admit I miss listening to you rap in the club ” LoL (We were both ’singing’ along to whatever songs came on at the club that we met at, and he claims he’s a really good rapper and it’s pretty hilarious. haha)

Ugh, I better be able to change my shift!!! I would HATE killing my weekend like that – I don’t get Friday night off, and then Saturday night would kill it as well if I have to work late! I don’t want to ‘hang out’ in the morning – our second date was already a daytime date, I want something more romantic (although the guggenheim was actually quite romantic, haha), and unrushed!

Anyway. My gay boyfriend called me from Hong Kong yesterday after I sent him an email with updates on me and Jake, and he was like “omg, that is the cutest story ever, and omg I’m going to puke from all the cuteness!” haha Seriously. I was chatting to my BFF and she was like “I hope you haven’t become those people who are so cute we just wanna puke” And I responded, “actually…I think we have. although it’s mostly when we’re just with each other and not around anyone else we know.” haha

I can’t wait to see him again – I actually kinda miss him!! 4 more days…(see, this is why I hated long distance relationships – a week is already quite a long time to be apart!). Keep your fingers crossed that I can change my shift!!

XOXO

Crap.

I really like him. Jake, that is. We had our second date today – he came along for brunch with my cousin & his gf, and then the two of us went to the Guggenheim. He was really affectionate, holding me around the waist as we walked, or while on the subway, and holding my hand and stuff. And at the museum, we shared our first totally sober kiss – it was so cute, he was standing behind me and leaning on my left, and our faces were really close and we were smiling and we kissed, at the Guggenheim.

We then walked over to the Met for the last half hour it was open, and then decided to go see a movie after picking up his laptop at work (he’s going away tomorrow for training for 3 days in a different state). I chose to see Zack and Miri Make a Porno (pretty funny, although I wish the ending was a little different). At the movie he was just as affectionate, and it was really cute. There was also affection in the way he was teasing me and calling me short, giving me nicknames like “Ground Floor” and joking about my height (I’m really not THAT short, but he’s really tall, so it makes me seem that much shorter I’m sure!).

By the time we parted, a whole slew of insecurities hit me, and then I realized that I’m starting to REALLY like him. I’m a little uneasy with how much I suddenly do, but also know that there is still a lot more to get to know about him, and I hope we’ll get to do so. Unfortunately, he’s away until Wednesday, and I’m working Wednesday to Friday night shifts, and then all day Saturday until closing (although I’m trying to change that so I can at least enjoy ONE weekend night next weekend), so I have no idea when I’ll see him next. Still, if last week is anything to go by I should hear from soon anyway, assuming he’s still interested in me (which I think he is…ahhh the insecurities again!)

Dammit. I liked being the one who was a little less interested – he was always clearly interested in me but now that I suddenly like him that much more, I feel like I’m losing control, in a way. Argh! Tell me I’m just thinking crazy, before I actually go crazy!

First Date with Jake!

Ok, so I went on my date last night, and had a great time, except I probably drank a little too much…ugh. Ended up making out with him which I didn’t want to do on the first date!

Anyway, let’s start at the beginning of the night: I was about 5 minutes late (had to take the subway, knowing I’d have to take a cab at the end of the night and y’kno, broke people take the subway), and he was standing on the corner as promised, and I swear, he is even better looking than I remembered him to be. (Swoon. lol) We walked a couple blocks to this Thai restaurant, one I’d actually been to in Brooklyn, and we ordered 2 entrees and a salad to share, but couldn’t finish anything since I think we were talking too much (he kept blaming me, haha) to really eat and ended up full without eating so much. We each had a lychee cocktail at dinner (him a mojito, me a martini), then went to a wine bar after and shared a bottle of red wine, then went to this Spanish bar/restaraurant/lounge that I’d been to before for another drink, then we passed Coyote Ugly so I was like “let’s go in!” hahah And he kept going on about how he didn’t think he’d go on a first date and end up at Coyote Ugly, lol. It was kinda boring though, there was no dancing or anything exciting whatsoever, but we DID share our first kiss there….swooooon. LoL

mmMmMm Before our first kiss he kept kind of leaning in and kissing my cheek, so I knew it was going to happen soon, and then he was looking me right in the eyes and we were both smiling and he kissed me. LOVED IT! haha

We then hit one final destination, and kissed a lot more. He smells so good! And is SO cute! I really think he looks like Ryan Gosling…haha.

So it turns out he’s half Polish and half Irish, is originally from the West coast but then moved to Florida when he was really young, and he doesn’t smoke or do any sort of drugs (love!) and has two degrees in accounting, and a law degree. He has a great sense of humor – at one point I was laughing so much that my cheeks were really sore (although now I can’t remember what it was that I was laughing about – dammit), and he was really funny when I told him my real name (did I mention that I made up my name on Saturday night? LoL Had to clear that up at the start of dinner…then at the wine bar he was like “Ok, I HAVE to change your name in my phone!” and when I first told him he was like “whatttt? I told my friends that I was going out with [fake name here]…and now that’s not even your name??” LoL). Also, I admitted that my BFF and I nicknamed him Jake Ryan b/c of the Ryan Gosling-lookalike thing, and I think he liked that. haha (I totally love that he already told his friends about me, PS!)

I think I may have invited him to brunch with me and my cousin and his girlfriend on Sunday, and then we thought we’d go to the Guggenheim since neither of us have been. Doesn’t that sound like a perfect Sunday date?

I’m so in love! LoL (Again, not really, but I really like him. heehee!)